If I had to choose one subject that my wife and I disagree in the most, it would definitely be finances. It’s not that we have different goals for our financial future (we’re definitely on the same page there), it’s that we don’t always communicate properly when it comes to money. We are not alone though. The #1 reason couples file for divorce in America is money problems. Here are some things you can try to keep money talks from turning into money fights…

• Communicate: In most marriages, one person handles all the finances and the other is just along for the ride. This is often a recipe for disaster! If you’re the money handler in the relationship, involve your partner. One simple way to do this is to maintain one check register in a common area of the house (like an office) that you both use to input receipts. This will allow both of you to know where your account balance stands and will incorporate your spouse into the process. The same concept can be applied to Quicken if you’re using their software to track your finances.

• Plan: Sit down when you’re both rested and not crunched for time (this will decrease the likelihood of an argument) and talk about what your goals are for your finances. This approach is often successful because you developed these goals together, as a couple, therefore it’s easier for both of you to stick to the plan. It’s hard to disagree with yourself (believe me, I’ve tried)!

• Build: Building a spending plan will allow you to see how much money you need each month to pay for fixed costs, and determine how much discretionary income you will have left over. The issue of discretionary income is where many people fail in their spending plan. That is because most people take the money they have left after bills and place it into categories like entertainment or eating out. This is asking for trouble! You cannot predict the future, and what you spend money on will change for month to month. Instead, decide for yourself where you will use your discretionary income. You know how much you have, and when it’s gone, it’s gone! This is extremely liberating because you can do/buy the things you want, while still being financially responsible. Look under the financial tools section of my site for some free spending plan forms to get you started.

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